so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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