i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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