i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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