So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
