She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
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lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
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How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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