You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize