I accidentally had phone sex last night
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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