I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize