it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
