If that was your dad, he is hot
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
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