David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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