Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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