The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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