Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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