How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
