I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize