Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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