he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
