Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
