i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize