READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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