Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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