Whoa Z and x make the same sound
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Randomize
