fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize