I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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