oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
