Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
