Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
