You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize