69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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