Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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