At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
