Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
