Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
