Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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