do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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