i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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