i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
is this the sara with the beer cane?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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