Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
babies were throwing up all over the place
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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