your room smells of hookers.
And success
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
