So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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