I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
