I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
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