Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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