are you so shy because you have an std?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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