on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
