Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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