I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize