please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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