Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
