She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
